the polariod

i found a picture of you today. you were in your teens. you seem so frail and self conscious. but i know it because i was there too.

it was that awkward time when things gave you a spill but i think in the end you came out fine.
after you grew out of being alive and shiny and wanting everyone to know who you were. you learned enough for the lesson.

you wanted to be so big and so great. you wanted to play with the other boys. to be like
the other boys. but you weren't. do you remember praying for it?
to be something else?

you were so much older than everyone your age, but so much younger too. so awkward not socialized.

i think you made some strides. i see you now much better off. i know you look back at
all your potential and wonder what happened.

it's still there.

i just wanted you to know that. you still have a lot to learn. i hope you find what you're looking for... what the universe wants from you. that will be your greatest achievement. i know it's hard to remember what with all the expectations of what we're supposed to be and supposed
to look like and how we're supposed to act.

but just be yourself. god will find you.

in the meantime enjoy yourself and take it for what it's worth. as i write this i know how hard it is. i know because i am you. i am looking at a picture of you now. but you've made strides. just remember that. it gets better i promise. i love you and god loves you and you are important.
you will do great things.